Since my letter/phone call from Ben, my spirit has been lifted. Just when I thought I couldn't take anymore disappointing days of no communication, I get 2 in one day! I know I should be getting a letter either tomorrow or the next day, so that's what's keeping me going. I miss him so much!
I had quite a day today at the daycare and got projectile puked on by a baby. I then had to drive home and change because it was EVERYWHERE. No biggie...just one of the hazards of the job!
I don't really have much to say except...28 more days!
Wednesday, August 29, 2007
Monday, August 27, 2007
TODAY! TODAY! TOOOOOOODAAAAAAAAAY!
I love today.
Today is the best.
Today is fabulous.
Today, I heard from Ben!!!!!
I got a letter in the mail with his handwriting on the envelope, and it was filled with graduation information and stuff, nothing personal. It was ENOUGH though. It was enough that I had something that he had sent to me, actually written on with his scribbly childish handwriting. I got home from dinner and my phone rang. IT WAS HIM! I recognized the 21o area code right away! This time, I didn't bawl my eyes out. I did start to choke up a bit, especially when I told him that I missed my rock and he told me that he missed me incredibly and that he cried a bit. I just love him so very very much. I told him that I was flying out for his graduation and he told me he'd help me pay for it! That's a relief. I think Jack might help too. With hotel/airfare/car rental, it's going to be quite pricey. Amazing.
That's how I feel.
AMAZING.
He said he's tired and sore and that he gets yelled at a lot...but that's normal. Honestly, the conversation is kind of a blur of happiness. I was just so happy to hear from him! I'm still soooo happy.
This has been such a great day. I can't wait to spread the smiles and happiness around.
I'm supposed to get another letter tomorrow or the next day. He's got another one too, just hasn't sent it yet. I mailed one off today, so he should get it Thursday or so. I'm mailing another one off tomorrow.
The post office is going to love me.
I think I'm going to go buy an Air Force hoodie.
Today is the best.
Today is fabulous.
Today, I heard from Ben!!!!!
I got a letter in the mail with his handwriting on the envelope, and it was filled with graduation information and stuff, nothing personal. It was ENOUGH though. It was enough that I had something that he had sent to me, actually written on with his scribbly childish handwriting. I got home from dinner and my phone rang. IT WAS HIM! I recognized the 21o area code right away! This time, I didn't bawl my eyes out. I did start to choke up a bit, especially when I told him that I missed my rock and he told me that he missed me incredibly and that he cried a bit. I just love him so very very much. I told him that I was flying out for his graduation and he told me he'd help me pay for it! That's a relief. I think Jack might help too. With hotel/airfare/car rental, it's going to be quite pricey. Amazing.
That's how I feel.
AMAZING.
He said he's tired and sore and that he gets yelled at a lot...but that's normal. Honestly, the conversation is kind of a blur of happiness. I was just so happy to hear from him! I'm still soooo happy.
This has been such a great day. I can't wait to spread the smiles and happiness around.
I'm supposed to get another letter tomorrow or the next day. He's got another one too, just hasn't sent it yet. I mailed one off today, so he should get it Thursday or so. I'm mailing another one off tomorrow.
The post office is going to love me.
I think I'm going to go buy an Air Force hoodie.
Sunday, August 26, 2007
still waiting...
Waiting
Waiting
Waiting.
I hate basic training! I hate everything about it right now, except Ben! Grrrrrrr. It's so hard not hearing from him! I have this false hope that he'll call today, but I just know that if I get my hopes up too high, I'll just be disappointed...just like I have been all week with no letters.
I want it to be the end of September RIGHT NOW.
I went to the movies with Chris, Jake, and Mike (booo!) last night. We went to Maccronni Grill and then to the Glenwood theater. Saw "Once" which is about a singer/songwriter and him meeting this girl. Very good indie film. I really didn't like the ending though. I would have done it differently. Afterwards, we went and hung out with Jake at his house. Visited with the guys, Jake's dad, brother, and sister-in-law. It was fun, but I was ready to go home...very tired!
I talked to Landon last night too. He has cut all ties with Nikole and is happier than he's ever been. Apparently, she was being really negative and mean to him and after awhile, he just couldn't take it anymore. It's weird though, because I've been talking to her and she misses him like crazy and wants to be with him. Oh well. I don't know what to say besides I'm happy that Landon is happy. He needs it. The new girl he's dating is helping him get his life in order and he's planning on moving back to MO to work with his dad and save up for a car. Seems like this is the first step of many on the path to get his life in order. He's attributing it to God, of course. He said that God's been working overtime and that seeing Ben get his life together and doing something for the future helped him see that he needed to do the same thing. It was a nice thing to hear, and I'm sincerely happy for him.
I'm off to watch XFILES.
Waiting
Waiting.
I hate basic training! I hate everything about it right now, except Ben! Grrrrrrr. It's so hard not hearing from him! I have this false hope that he'll call today, but I just know that if I get my hopes up too high, I'll just be disappointed...just like I have been all week with no letters.
I want it to be the end of September RIGHT NOW.
I went to the movies with Chris, Jake, and Mike (booo!) last night. We went to Maccronni Grill and then to the Glenwood theater. Saw "Once" which is about a singer/songwriter and him meeting this girl. Very good indie film. I really didn't like the ending though. I would have done it differently. Afterwards, we went and hung out with Jake at his house. Visited with the guys, Jake's dad, brother, and sister-in-law. It was fun, but I was ready to go home...very tired!
I talked to Landon last night too. He has cut all ties with Nikole and is happier than he's ever been. Apparently, she was being really negative and mean to him and after awhile, he just couldn't take it anymore. It's weird though, because I've been talking to her and she misses him like crazy and wants to be with him. Oh well. I don't know what to say besides I'm happy that Landon is happy. He needs it. The new girl he's dating is helping him get his life in order and he's planning on moving back to MO to work with his dad and save up for a car. Seems like this is the first step of many on the path to get his life in order. He's attributing it to God, of course. He said that God's been working overtime and that seeing Ben get his life together and doing something for the future helped him see that he needed to do the same thing. It was a nice thing to hear, and I'm sincerely happy for him.
I'm off to watch XFILES.
Saturday, August 25, 2007
1 week, 1 day
It's been one week and one day since I've heard from Ben. I figured for sure that today would be the day I would get a letter. No such luck. I'm actually going crazy. PLEASE. PLEASE let him call this weekend.
I hate not knowing what's going on with him...it makes me think about the "what-ifs". I talked to his parents, and they haven't heard from him either. I know he's busy, but I'm just beside myself. I can't stand not hearing or reading the words, "I love you". I need to hear that! I just want him to know that I'm thinking about him and that I miss him and love him.
I hate not knowing what's going on with him...it makes me think about the "what-ifs". I talked to his parents, and they haven't heard from him either. I know he's busy, but I'm just beside myself. I can't stand not hearing or reading the words, "I love you". I need to hear that! I just want him to know that I'm thinking about him and that I miss him and love him.
Friday, August 24, 2007
Waiting and waiting
Still no letter.
Still no call.
It's been a week since I've heard anything from him.
I don't like this.
I want to know he's ok and thinking about me.
I'm in a weird funk and I just can't seem to get out of it. I need something to cheer me up...
like, a letter.
I'm seriously going crazy. I need some kind of word from him.
Maybe tomorrow...maybe tomorrow.
PLEASE, tomorrow. I can't take this waiting much longer.
Still no call.
It's been a week since I've heard anything from him.
I don't like this.
I want to know he's ok and thinking about me.
I'm in a weird funk and I just can't seem to get out of it. I need something to cheer me up...
like, a letter.
I'm seriously going crazy. I need some kind of word from him.
Maybe tomorrow...maybe tomorrow.
PLEASE, tomorrow. I can't take this waiting much longer.
Wednesday, August 22, 2007
Today is/was
Today is me and Ben's 5 year 2 month anniversary. I wish I could tell him I love him.
Today was my first day of classes...or should I say CLASS. Yeah, I only have one class on Wednesdays. Pretty nice. Hopefully, I will be able to work at the daycare in the morning. I have 4 novels to read in that class, plus 2 textbooks. I only have to write papers on 2 of the books though, so I might just cliff note the other 2.
Tomorrow is the beginning of my 8am classes. I'm kind of confused about everything though, and I've tried contacting the teacher, my advisor, and the curriculum instructor for EDCI classes, and no one can seem to help me. I'm just going to go to class and if it's messed up, they're going to have to fix it, because I've been contacting people since I first got an email from my teacher on Monday.
I think I'm going to go and write Ben a letter.
*I'm really lonely*
Today was my first day of classes...or should I say CLASS. Yeah, I only have one class on Wednesdays. Pretty nice. Hopefully, I will be able to work at the daycare in the morning. I have 4 novels to read in that class, plus 2 textbooks. I only have to write papers on 2 of the books though, so I might just cliff note the other 2.
Tomorrow is the beginning of my 8am classes. I'm kind of confused about everything though, and I've tried contacting the teacher, my advisor, and the curriculum instructor for EDCI classes, and no one can seem to help me. I'm just going to go to class and if it's messed up, they're going to have to fix it, because I've been contacting people since I first got an email from my teacher on Monday.
I think I'm going to go and write Ben a letter.
*I'm really lonely*
Tuesday, August 21, 2007
Everything will be alright.
Yes, everything will be alright. Every day, I check the mail, hoping to see a letter from Ben. I know it's coming soon...and it's making me crazy waiting for it! I've got another set to send out to him, along with pictures of my room. Here's how my room is set up this year:
Picture wall, door to bathroom
I turned my desk on it's side...now it's a tv/microwave stand
2 closets, dresser in between
Computer desk, picture wall
Fridge. Cool pictures and magnets
Yearly photo collages.
(too bad the one on the far left fell off the wall and broke the outer part. Now it's in a different spot with no glass/hard plastic protecting the pictures)
My big, lonely, empty bed.
Picture wall, door to bathroom
I turned my desk on it's side...now it's a tv/microwave stand
2 closets, dresser in between
Computer desk, picture wall
Fridge. Cool pictures and magnets
Yearly photo collages.
(too bad the one on the far left fell off the wall and broke the outer part. Now it's in a different spot with no glass/hard plastic protecting the pictures)
School starts tomorrow. I only have one class...and it's in the afternoon! Hopefully, they'll be able to use me in the daycare in the mornings. (I really hope so!) I got bumped up in pay, so now I'm making what I should have been making to begin with. Some of the people working last year definitely didn't deserve to even make mininum wage! It's nice to be back though, I sure do love the kids there!
I'm off to bed.
I'm off to bed.
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