5 year anniversary, maid of honor/wedding, and Cornerstone

What a busy lady I've been the past week.





Friday was our 5 year anniversary. It was pretty simple, but that's what we both decided on. We're both working hard for the money...and are coming up short. ha. I've got some nice pictures though.








5 years is a long time...but not really, when you think about it being a tiny part of your future together. It's been rocky, it's been amazing, it's been a journey and we've come so far. I'm proud of us!


So I was in a wedding today. The maid of honor. The preparations were hectic and we ran late (of course), but the ceremony was beautiful. I've known the bride for almost 10 years now, and the groom for almost 6. Wonderful ceremony, awesome reception, and they're both as happy as can be! I can't really say much more than that. I got some good ideas for the wedding that is hopefully going to occur sometime in my future. I saw some stuff that I could do and some that I definitely won't do. ha.
Now for the ridiculousness of the day:
1. The preacher was really bossy and wanted things done his way. It was quite annoying. He had these giant gaudy rings on his hands and made sure that they were showing when pictures were being taken.
2. The morning of the wedding, the bride's brother and girlfriend got into a fight. She pushed him, he pushed her back and she fell and broke her arm. That's the story they gave us. Not sure if he did it himself or if the push really did do it.
3. The other bridesmaid is quite weird. She kept singing songs from popular musicals VERY loud, and sounded very much like American Idol wannabes. It was annoying. Well, the day of the wedding, she faked having breathing problems. She wasn't sick. I can see through bad acting. She did this several times during the course of the day, but miraculously felt better in time to sing a song to the bride and groom. Lordy. At one point, she was grasping the wall and pretending to cry (there were no tears). I couldn't believe that no one else could see that she was faking it. She even got carried out to the car! She refused pain medicine AND refused to call her mother. Does that sound like someone who actually has something wrong with her? No. I know I'm going on and on about this, but I hate fakers...especially when they're seeking attention at times when the attention should be one someone else (hello? The BRIDE AND GROOM!). Oh well. She's a weirdo, and with luck, I'll never have to see her again.
4. My cell phone got taken. I heard my phone ringing right before I went out and did my maid of honor walk down the aisle, and I pushed the button to ignore the call. I set it on the table...3 people saw me do this...well, I walked in right after the ceremony and it was gone. I tried to call it, and it was turned off. I was freaking out because it had pictures of Philip on there, and I didn't save those to my computer. I prayed all the way to the reception, and when the bride's sister got there, she handed it to me. She told me that someone had found it out in the middle of the yard! So someone had taken it out there and dropped it or just left it out there. I'm thankful. Phones can be replaced, pictures can't.


I leave...technically tonight...for Cornerstone. Hopefully, Chip has gotten ahold of Tim and we have directions. I have to do laundry when I wake up and finish packing. I'm definitely bringing a book to read on the way. I can't handle mindless chatter for 6.5 hours. Not that it's going to be ALL mindless, but if I don't want to talk, I'll have something do do besides play with my phone.

I cannot wait to see all the bands. Copeland is going to be playing a smaller stage (thank goodness), so I"m going to have to get there WAY early to be up front. ah, if only I had a backstage pass, I wouldn't have to deal with the damn audience. I can't stand the stupid Christian scene kids that think the most ridiculous things are funny. I will break them.

I'm off to bed. Got to get some sleep for tomorrow!

Close your eyes and it will come to you.

Work tonight was lame.
No work tomorrow. I think I'll sleep in.

I miss my friends who don't live near me. Damn gas prices.

5 year anniversary is this Friday and we have no plans. Goodness.

Birthday is in a week, and nothing has been planned. Goodness.

Cornerstone is going to be awesome.

...
Also...
why is it that you need to save money when I ask you to come up, but you can afford it when someone else wants you to?
Also...
why do you always forget to tell me about stuff?

Gah. I'm hoping tonight will be fun, and not disappointing.

Funeral today

Went to Aunt Ruby's funeral today. It was a very nice service. I didn't talk to her husband. I just couldn't bring myself to talk to someone who had mistreated his wife for almost 60 years and for mistreating his kids for pretty much their entire lives. Blah. I am glad that she is finally out of pain, and her dementia is notw gone. She's at peace in Heaven, and that's all anyone could ask for.

I work tonight...by myself. Not too excited, but it's a Monday, and that's how it goes. It just seems dumb to have 3 people working during the day and only one at night. Oh well.

One more thing:
It's kind of frustrating being kind, considerate, and understanding to everything...and then getting jumped on because of a voice inflection that a certain person didn't like. Are you kidding me? I'm sorry that you're having a "grumpy day", but that doesn't mean that you get to take it out on me. You've had a lot of grumpy days lately and I've been feeling the brunt of your irritation. Stop it. I'm not doing anything. I'm having a hard month, and you're not doing anything to make it any easier on me.

4 days until our 5 year anniversary
7 days until we leave for Cornerstone
8 days until my birthday

I'll share some pictures of the day:

You know, I had a great day today, and it was kind of brought down by an attitude.

I guess that from now on, I can only be excited about something or interested in something as long as everyone else is interested in it and just as excited about it. I guess that's what I'm supposed to do. It doesn't matter that I get excited for everyone when something cool happens to/for them, regardless of my interest or excitement in it.

Police!

I had to call the police while I was at work today.
Lately, we've been getting these harassing phone calls at work, and they've started to get scary/creepy. They told one girl that they were watching her, and then asked her how she was in bed. It's just scary, especially when you're getting them when you're alone in the store.
Well, today I got one. First, line 2 rang. Line 2 doesn't ring unless: a. someone is on line 1 (no one was) or b. they know the number. Well, as soon as I got to the phone (2 rings), they hung up. Line 1 started ringing and I answered it. An older man's voice came over the phone, "How good are you at tickeling?" Ok, stupid, but scary too. I said, "Listen. I'm absolutely sick to death of these phone calls. We've called the police and we're tracing the numbers that come into this store. They're tracing your number right now, so you'd better stop it." I then hung up. They're not tracing our numbers, but I hope it scared them. I called the police, and they filed a report.
I really hope that shit stops.

Going over to Beth's tonight. She's having a bonfire at her house, and I really hope it's like old times. I used to have so much fun at her dad's! Hopefully, this shall be an enjoyable night.

I'm officially done with my summer class. My last essay sucked, and I didn't participate much in the discussion board, but I only needed to keep 6 points to keep a B, and I'm pretty sure I achieved that. Not too hard. No more boring scholarly journals or stupid articles by psuedo-intellectuals for me! I'm FREE! (Well, not really...I've still got to work.

6 more days until our 5 year anniversary
9 more days until we leave for Cornerstone
10 more days until my birthday

yaaaaaaaaaaaaay.

My stomach hurts.

I honestly don't understand people sometimes.

Something sad happened, and you just casually brush it off your shoulder. No words of comfort. Just brush it off and don't worry about it. Oh, and then pick at me about something minuscule furthuring my irratation. Oh, and then pick at me about something else. Please, continue on. I'm pretty much done calling you for any kind of support. I'll only get it from my mom from now on.
Stop playing your game when I'm trying to talk to you.
When I said I had a really bad day, you said, "No worries." What? Were you even listening to what I was saying? No. You weren't. You were playing your game and giving that your attention. When will I be number 1?
Whatever.

Some exciting things are coming up, and I'm not even excited.

I've lost someone for the third time this year. Goodbye, Aunt Ruby. I'll never forget the delicious brownies you gave me when I came over to your house. I'm sorry I didn't get to see you before you go. I hope that now that you're in Heaven, you can remember everything all over again. Just know that you were wonderful, and enjoy your time with Grandma. I hope you're happy and peaceful now.

Why is it that death is coming around this year? Phillip, Emma, Aunt Ruby. 3 people in less than 6 months. Last year was Dean and Harry. I shouldn't be able to name 5 people who have died in less than 2 year's time. I'm only 21. I shouldn't be losing this many people. It's making me afraid of losing people even more. I'm terrified to lose my mom. I don't know what I would do. I fought with her so much growing up, pushed her away, we both misunderstood one another, and now we're closer than I could have ever imagined. What will I do when she's gone? It's a fear that I carry with me everyday. I haven't told anyone, because everyone I know just brushes serious stuff that I say right off. So I keep it inside.

No big family for me.

One reason on the list of why I don't want a big family:

I absolutely hate it when people use my stuff without asking.

My brother uses my expensive hair stuff. (He VERY short hair, so there is NO reason that he needs to use a hair mask.)

Gah.

Feeling better

Well, I feel better after talking to him last night. It wasn't a fight. I just told him how I was feeling, and he apologized and said that there was an immaturity in him that he needed to work on. I greatly appreciated his honesty and the fact that he was able to admit that he was wrong. I feel so much better!

Birthday stuff:

I have absolutely had it.

I'm sick and tired of being ignored.
I'm sick and tired of being forgotten.
I'm sick and tired of being put behind EVERYTHING else.
I'm sick and tired of being treated like nothing more than an acquaintance.

Don't tell me that you don't do it on purpose. You NEVER do it on purpose, and yet you never make an effort to fix it.

I tell you things and it rolls right off your back. How do you think that makes me feel? (I'll give you a hint, it's NOT good.)


I'm fucking sick of it.

I'm in tears over this, and you couldn't care less.

Another Sunday night

Worked today. It started off terrible. The clasp on my necklace came loose, and when I realized it, I was missing my diamond heart pendant...the very first piece of jewelry Ben gave me. After a tearful search, I found it in a crevice in my car (thank goodness!). I had a stupid guy come in first thing in the morning and try to cheat the system of movies. He was lying, and I knew it. He said, "What's your manager's name?" I answered him. He told me he wasn't going to get me in trouble, and I answered, "I wouldn't get in trouble. I'm following the rules. My manager will tell you the same thing." He left. I had a lady call, and right off the bat she was yelling. I told her to stop and try to explain the situation. After I figured out what happened (she returned the case without the disc in it), she told me that she'd look for it, but if she couldn't find it, we were going to have problems. Excuse me? She later started screaming into the phone, and then hung up on me.
Thank goodness that I had a ton of awesome people that came in later on. I love my customers, but I seriously would love to get a job at a daycare instead of dealing with the assholes in this small town. They treat people like shit, and think they're better than everyone else, but in reality, they're just small town trash.

In other news, this is my last week taking my summer class. I'm definitely not sorry! It's been a LONG 5 weeks! I won't miss the long scholarly journals I have to read, nor will I miss the reports every week! YAY!

I really wish I wasn't still waiting...
I'm just tired of give-give-give, and not getting the same in return. The simplest things are met with resistance, and I don't understand why it's hard to think of me first.

Getting old

It gets frustrating after awhile. It's not fun feeling as if you're just a convenience to the people around you, especially those closest to you.
It doesn't even matter what I say, because I've said it all before. Over and over and over.

Emma is dying. We went up to the nursing home tonight to check on her and she's barely there. I hope she goes peacefully. I'll be sad to see her go, but she's lived a long hard life, and she needs to enjoy some peace.

I don't even really know what else to say. I'm just frustrated at a lot of things, and as usual, I can't find the words to express how I'm feeling.

Goodness

It feels like this summer is just starting. June always feels that way for me.

June 10th will mark the 7 year anniversary of when I lost my grandma. It's still really hard to think about the fact that I'm living my life without her in it. I'm very thankful that my mom and I are close now, just as close as my grandma and I were. I need that kind of relationship. I don't really know what to say, because what I'm thinking gets jumbled up if I try to express it through talking or writing. I just can't get it out. I can't express how I feel about it.

This will be a good month though:
5 year anniversary
Cornerstone
birthday

Hopefully all of those will be amazing. I just want something special planned for me. Just once. Something done for me as a surprise. Something that will make me think, "Wow. [insert name here] really gave a lot of thought about me to make [insert event here] special. I'm lucky." That's all I want. Maybe I sound whiney or childish, but this is exactly how I feel.

In other news, I wish people would shut the hell up about Paris Hilton. I don't care if she's in jail. I think she should have to spend more than the 20 odd days she has because other people in her situation would. Stupid trumped up wanna be celebrity. Geeze. It wouldn't be a big deal, but it's on EVERY channel. I just need to turn my tv off.

Honestly, what is wrong with people?

The people in this town make me want to lock myself up in a room and not have any contact with society ever again. Tonight, it wasn't just about their inability to understand that movies are alphabetized or that when their movies are late, they're going to have late fees. Tonight was more, much more.
We've been getting harassing phone calls, and I got one again tonight. Here's the convo: (keep in mind, there's a lot of slurring from the drunk lady.)
Drunk Lady: Is this Movie Gallery?
Me: Yes, it is.
DL: Someone just now called me and left me a nasty message on my phone telling me that I had late fees and you guys were coming after my ass, motherfuckers....
Me: Fuck you. *click*
I then proceeded to hang up on her. It takes a lot to make me that upset, but there's only so much harassment I can take.
I went back to the back and started to count down the money...I then heard someone banging on the doors screaming, "FUCK YOOOOOOOU!" I grabbed the phone and went to investigate. Some asshole kids were there. I asked them, "Is there a problem?" One smart ass kid said, "Yeah, you're closed and I want a movie." (Sounds just like something my brother would say). I said, "I've got your liscense plates, if you don't leave, I'm calling the police. You're also banned from the store." Then, the tough kids flipped me off. It was quite intimidating. (note the sarcasm, please.)

I just want to know when it became ok for people to treat others that they don't even know like complete shit. It just seems like I've been on the receiving end of this lately, and it's revolved around Movie Gallery. It's really upsetting.

In happier news, Mom and I are doing crafts tomorrow. I'm pretty excited about that. Something to look forward to on my day off from work.